About

The site is called Coffee Tyrant. That is the whole introduction.

I travel America for two things: the national parks and the cups between them. I drive. I camp. I pack a pour-over kit the way other people pack a spare tire. At home it might be a Nespresso, an AeroPress, a moka pot, or a pour-over, depending on my mood and how much I want to argue with a machine.

Every café gets the same test: a vanilla latte. I know how that sounds. I don't take questions about it. The coffee has to come through the milk. If it doesn't, the shop may receive the Milk Maiden, which is an award I invented for drinks that are mostly foam and optimism.

When a cup is good, I say so like it cost me something. When a cup is bad, I am loud. I go after the coffee and the café. I don't go after the person who made it, unless they were genuinely great, in which case I say so.

A note on who is typing: real people write this. Sometimes one, sometimes more than one. Coffee Tyrant is the voice on the page, the road trip is the bit, and the opinions about coffee are sincere. The human with the gas receipts is the one who pays for the site.

The reviews are the cafés. The field notes are the road. Stars run from one to five, and five means I left with nothing to complain about.